[Infertility] Finding the strength to be a supportive wife...

My dear sweet sisters,
I have found that one of the greatest struggles with infertility is remembering to be a godly wife, even when that test reads "negative" for the millionth time and all hope of motherhood seems to be lost.  God calls women to be a support system for their husbands, to be a joy in their lives, to be their strength during times of weakness and often times that is almost impossible when we are dealing with infertility. Our poor husbands have to deal with so much on this journey, but probably the hardest thing for them is watching us beat ourselves up over something completely out of our control, something that they are unable to fix no matter how hard they try. Infertility can be a very self centered time for us women. We are often time so focused on what we can't do and all the things that are going wrong for us individually, that we forget that we can be a wife, we can be a support system for our husbands every now and then. It is during the times we feel we are completely spent that God calls us to dig a little deeper and find the strength to keep going for our husbands. We can make him smile even when we want to cry and we can brighten his day when we know this journey takes it's toll. My sweet darling husband has been so incredibly patient throughout this journey, especially when I haven't been the sweetest wife.


Here are some tips for being the kind of wife our husbands deserve(with a little help from my wonderful hubby) :
1. Smile, I guarantee you that your husband would do almost anything to put a smile on your face. When we are happy, they are happy. I know this journey is FULL of ups, downs, and loop-d-loops, but that does not mean we have to be miserable every second of every day.
2. Understand that they are ALWAYS there for us and they will stand by us even if our bodies continue to betray us.
3. Pray for them: Ask for strength, ask for wisdom, ask for peace, thank God for him, etc. Praying for our husbands should be something we all do on a daily basis as a way of supporting them, but next time you are begging God for a baby change your prayer to a selfless prayer for your husband.
4. Remember to date them, they deserve a dinner and a movie without the incessant "I can't drink this" "I can't eat that" "Am I ovulating tonight?".  Do not let romance die in your relationship because you cannot stop thinking about your desire to be a mother.
5. Always encourage them!!!! Tell them you are proud of them for working so hard, thank them for putting up with your insanity, tell them how handsome/sexy/amazing/etc they are!
6. NEVER BLAME THEM or tell them they don't understand. They are going through the exact same pain and feelings that we are, just because they don't show it like we do doesn't mean they are immune.
7. Lucky number 7, do not forget to make love to them. We get so caught up in the timing and the charting that we forget how important making love is to a relationship. LOVE not sex, not baby making, LOVE.
Finally, remember he is your partner in crime, tell him how you feel(if it's easier keep a journal and let him read it). You are in this together, and together you will get through this trial with God's mighty hand over you both!